Ventilation

I'm in desperate need of venting... Just got off the phone from my sister, which helped a great deal but still I'm a little frustrated and wound up. "It's only a game" people say... so what? I can't be annoyed with a performance or lack thereof? I have expectations and I get annoyed when they aren't lived up to. I don't like being made to look like a fool, and tonight that is just what happened.

Netball... got smashed. Cricket... lost a game we had won. I can't take the blame for the netball game. I was one of the better players, which is usually the case if I'm playing netball (even if I say so myself). Missed quite a few shots that I would ordinarily sink with my eyes shut, but still I was one of the better players in the team.

Cricket... I pride myself on my fielding. I'm usually competitive with the bat, but not outstanding, and I bowl pretty well but nothing brilliant. I'm a decent sort of all round player. Tonight, my fielding sucked, my batting sucked ... but my bowling was pretty good. Got two bowled wickets tonight, which I don't get often but I usually keep the runs down pretty well. I tend to beat the bat a lot outside off stump. Tonight I beat the bat and hit middle and leg ... and then leg later on in another over. I was happy with that.

I sat on the back net, for a couple of overs, and watched balls sailed to the left and right of me. I looked like a fool. In one over I let 17 runs past me. Noone else could field them, so it was my job. I failed. We lost the game by 9 runs. It wasn't my fault in the last couple of overs, although I did miss a runout that should have been a given. Even so, take the run for the shot and the five for the wicket, they still win by three.

I should probably go to bed because I've got a long drive tomorrow, and have to be up fairly early to go to Uni in the morning. I'm just a bit wound up and need to settle so I can sleep. I'm beginning to wind down a little now, so I might head off shortly and get organised for bed. I'm still annoyed that we lost. Not because we lost, but because I lost the game for our team. I was the weak link, and I don't like being the weak link.